Showing posts with label Ileana Johnson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ileana Johnson. Show all posts

Thursday, June 16, 2016

Breakfast Fit for a Queen

Having breakfast in a five star Italian hotel was a unique artistic experience – they left nothing to chance. Tables were decorated with crisp embroidered linens, pressed and starched to perfection, with small arrangements of fresh flowers on every table. Artsy clear vases filled with oranges or lemons added a touch of classy color to the marbled floors.   

Breakfast area fit for a queen
Photo: Ileana Johnson 2016
The antique chairs were decorated with cotton brocade, not a wrinkle or stain in sight; the covers were removed after breakfast. The large bay windows overlooked layered terraces with exotic potted plants, orange and lemon trees, lounge chairs with umbrellas, and verdant gardens. Blooming plants and bushes I’ve never seen before were overwhelming my senses.


Lemons Photo: Ileana Johnson
 
The food was an assortment of breakfast items fit for a queen, artfully displayed by a chef – from yogurt, compote, Italian prunes, peeled fruits, real scrambled eggs, crepes, boiled eggs, panna cotta, chopped vegetables, cereals, rice milk, soy milk, cow’s milk, to an espresso machine that made every type of coffee sophisticated palates might desire; fresh squeezed juices, cheeses, rolls, croissants, and miniature coffee desserts completed the elegant tables. And the hot chocolate was so thick that it looked like molten chocolate lava. I had to add lots of milk to make it more palatable to me. A basket of exotic teas and a silver pitcher filled with hot water invited us to a steaming porcelain cup of tea.

Galleria Photo: Ileana 2016
It was cold outside, in the low fifties, damp and drizzly Milanese weather.  I had a cashmere sweater on layered with a cotton t-shirt but it was not warm enough. It was a good day for museum hopping and window shopping.

I picked a tie in a silk boutique for my hubby.  Another boutique that was moving from the Galleria to another location was offering umbrellas, costume jewelry, richly decorated canes, theater binoculars, ballroom masks, silver and gold pieces with ornate turquoise, and coral beads. Intricate cameos displayed the fine artistry of Sorrento’s shell carvers. I have watched one such carver on a previous trip to Sorrento; he had a deep blister in his palm where he was holding a short stick with the cameo on one end. He was carving it with so much focus that the raw skin in his palm did not seem to matter.
 

Duomo front door Photo: Ileana
We entered the Duomo because I wanted to pray for my family and to light a candle in memory of my Dad. It was even colder inside; the majestic stained glass windows did nothing to increase the warmth of the cold marble floors and walls. There was a service in progress already and signs of Silenzio were posted here and there. Tourists were still quietly milling about, taking photographs.  This time I couldn’t climb the stairs to the roof to admire the flying buttresses and the gargoyles up close. The spectacular panorama of the city that we saw eight years ago would have to wait on this cold and dreary day.

Getting lost was a daily occurrence in Italy; it was part of the exploratory fun. We never knew what we might find along the way. A little old lady walking in high heels but with a cane, asked us if we needed help. You had to admire the Italian ladies’ fashion sense that could not be compromised even when handicapped. Who wants to wear comfortable shoes when they are so unsightly?  We must have looked utterly lost, chattering in English. I explained to her in Italian that we were looking for the metro station. She smiled and told us with a friendly wink that, on May Day every year, all public transportation stops at 7 p.m.  Of course, tourists like us, even though I speak Italian, did not get the memo that on the International Socialist Labor Day, public transportation will grind to a halt and tourists will be stranded miles away from their suburban hotels where prices are more reasonable.

Milan's largest public park Photo: Ileana Johnson 2016
 
We backtracked through the public park, passing ponds with geese, ducks, turtles, and large fish coming to the edge to be hand-fed. A few local kids were playing soccer in the muddy grass even though a sign said clearly, “Stay off the grass.” Italians are obsessed with their city grass, no humans are allowed to pass through, rest, or play on it.

We finally hailed a spotless cab and, for nine euros, it dropped us off by the Duomo again. We were still far away from our hotel. We decided to eat dinner. For 81 euros we had very bland and non-descript pasta at Savini, a great disappointment.  The only thing I enjoyed was the complimentary grissini (bread sticks) that came with the meal and the bottled mineral water. When it came time for gelato, the gelateria had already closed for the night. The town had rolled the streets up. The metal gate entrances to the metro were locked with heavy chains and it resembled a dungeon.

Milan's Duomo at night Photo: Ileana Johnson 2016
 
While in the Piazza del Duomo, bathed in the copious light illuminating the Milanese cathedral, we joined a huge taxi line of at least 100 people, shivering in the damp evening. A few non-taxi Arab drivers, eager to make a profit, approached several people in line and offered to take us to our hotel for 100 euros, about $120. Such an outrageous fee yet there were takers. A few Japanese tourists climbed into unmarked cars, probably so anxious to get out of the cold that they did not care whether it was safe, reasonably priced, or a good idea. We stood in line behind two girls from Boston who were studying in Nice and had taken a weekend trip to Milan. When our turn came, the taxi fare was only 25 euros, four times less than the scalpers had asked. The crabby taxi driver told us very gruffly to get out of the cab, we were too slow for her; she was in a hurry to go back and pick up more stranded tourists.
Part of the taxi line in Milan
Photo: Ileana 2016
 
 

 

Friday, August 29, 2014

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Diability Insurance and the Social Security Stripping of Funds

John Q Taxpayer wrote in a commentary on the web:

“I woke up this morning and the whole world was backwards. Right is now wrong, illegal immigration is an act of love, self-defense is not permitted, the rich are evil, God is banned, the government of the people is out to get the people, the truth is forbidden, the ignorant are in charge of the intelligent, communism is good, robbery is overlooked, free speech is regulated, money is evil.”

Illegal aliens have more rights and benefits than American citizens, personal property is fair game because it was not earned, it was stolen from the lazy and uneducated, living and breathing causes the earth to go into global warming Armageddon, criminal enemies and jihadis are welcomed with open arms through the southern border with a Club Med socialist red carpet to speed up our demise, sovereignty is selfish and passé, speaking English is offensive to invading ethnic groups, we are now global citizens, the flag, the national anthem and the Pledge of Allegiance are racist, our culture and Christianity are insulting to primitive cultures who should have stayed in the hell hole they came from if they are offended,  and being American is shameful and socially unjust.

“Somebody wake me up, this must be a nightmare.”

Unfortunately it is the “new norm.” We are brainwashed to this “new norm” every day through manufactured crisis after manufactured crisis. The low information voters are convinced that our economy is booming, we don’t have almost 100 million Americans out of work, there are no discouraged workers, unemployment went down below six percent, and life could not be better as long as the welfare checks keep rolling in. Would the cash cow not run out of money eventually, even printing them ad nauseam?

Data from the U.S. Treasury show that “Social Security retirement and disability programs have dedicated resources sufficient to cover benefits for the next 19 years, until 2033. However, the projected depletion date for the Separate Social Security Disability Insurance (DI) Trust Fund is only two years away, in late 2016.” Because in 2016 “dedicated revenues are projected to be depleted and will only cover 80 percent of scheduled benefit payments,” the report recommends that “legislation will be needed to address this financial imbalance.”
http://www.treasury.gov/press-center/press-releases/Pages/jl2587.aspx

At the end of 2013 11 million people were receiving DI payments. The number of people receiving DI benefits grew by 0.9 percent. This growth increase reflects the gradual aging of the population as well as increases in the insured population. (pp. 35-36) http://www.ssa.gov/oact/tr/2014/tr2014.pdf

According to the Federal Insurance Contributions Act (FICA), an employer must withhold three separate taxes from employee wages:

- 6.2 percent Social Security tax

- 1.45 percent Medicare tax

- 0.9 percent Medicare surtax for employees earning over $200,000 (began in 2013)

The FICA law requires employers to match the 6.2 percent Social Security tax, the 1.45 percent Medicare tax, but not the 0.9 Medicare surtax. http://www.bizfilings.com/toolkit/sbg/tax-info/payroll-taxes/employers-responsibility-fica-payroll-taxes.aspx

Social Security Disability Insurance protects more than 160 million American workers with an average benefit of $1,146 per month (May 2014), slightly above the 2014 federal poverty line for an individual of $972. “For more than 80 percent of beneficiaries, Disability Insurance is their main source of income. For one-third, it is their only source of income.” http://cdn.americanprogress.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/SSDIBrief.pdf

Secretary of the Treasury Jack Lew testified before Congress in August 2014, proposing a change in Social Security funding.  From the 6.3 percent contribution, 9/10 of one percent goes to the disability insurance fund which is so tapped that will allegedly be insolvent by mid-2016. Secretary Lew wants to shift a couple of tens of one percent from the Social Security fund to the disability fund.

According to Dick Morris, the disability insurance (DI) fund is stressed by the extra 20 percent increase in disability recipients. Why is there such a sudden increase of disabled people under this administration when the U.S. population grew by only 4 points “since Obama became president?”  Morris explained that this growth is attributed to “shaky diagnoses that are highly subjective such as back pain, psychological conditions, migraines, and not from serious diseases such as cancer, heart disease, or diabetes.” He is of the opinion that funding such subjective claims by “stripping money from Social Security is a horrible decision.” https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?shva=1#inbox/147f417f22124eda

Social Security’s establishment 80 years ago was necessary to “ensure the security of the men, women and children of the nation against the hazards and vicissitudes of life.” It is those who take advantage of the system dishonestly who can actually work but choose not to, and illegal aliens who draw benefits that are problematic.

 

Friday, July 9, 2010

Superstitions

Because my ancestors were both Romans and Dacians, I have superstition DNA running through my blood. I did not realize the degree of infection until I had my first child. Every day I changed Mimi's crib sheets I would find a large butcher knife under her mattress. I would take it and put it back in the kitchen. The next day, the knife would re-appear. It was so odd, it did not occur to me to ask mom why the knife was there every day. Then one day, without explanation, the knife disappeared. When I finally did ask mom, she explained that knives protected babies from evil spirits until they were baptized. Sure enough, Mimi had been baptized the day before. This reminded me of the fairy tale in which the king invited the fairies to cast good spells on his newborn but forgot to invite the thin-skinned one. The uninvited fairy gifted the little girl with a life of misery, locked in a castle until Prince Charming would appear to rescue her from a seemingly impossible to climb tower.

I knew about the proverbial black cat crossing the road. I always returned home when that happened, no matter where I was going, including school. I knew a bad grade or occurrence were sure to follow. But Romanians took it a bit further, they spit nine times and said an incantation before avoiding the black cat.

Mom and grandma Elena thought that wearing a shirt inside out meant that one is cheating on his/her spouse. My response was always, mom, I don't have a spouse, and what is a spouse? Was this somehow related to the English phrase, "turncoat?" Probably not.

The salt over the left shoulder was definitely Roman - it cast away evil spirits lurking around the dinner table. Walking under a ladder was also a bad idea. A broken mirror brought 7 years of bad luck.

Sneezing was a dangerous time since it was believed that, for a brief moment, the soul left the body and evil spirits could crawl in. People nearby would wish "noroc," "good luck," to keep the evil spirits from inhabiting your body while the soul was floating somewhere in the air.

Families in mourning had to wear black for six months or the deceased could not rest in peace. Close family members could not shave, wash their hair, comb their hair, look in a mirror or the deceased would become a ghost.

If it rained the day of the funeral or during the funeral, it was a sign that the deceased was sorry to go and had regrets that she/he had not expressed before their final breath.

Babies that had not been baptized and passed away could not be buried in the regular cemetery, they had plots outside the fence, as their bodies might be corrupted by evil spirits lurking in a holy place.

Newborns wore red ribbons tied or sewn into their little hats to protect them from the evil eye. Romans and Romanians truly believed that, if you had blue or green eyes, you had the power to bewitch a person and change their state of health and well-being. To escape a terrible fate from the evil eye, an incantation was said over a glass of fresh water from a spring into which a burning match was extinguished. The recipient of the evil eye had to drink the water in order to destroy the potential effect of any evil spell.

Brides had to step into their home with their right foot first. To do so with the left foot was sinister and invited terrible misfortune in the marriage. To prevent brides from tripping, a sign of bad luck, the groom would carry them over the threshold.

During the church wedding ceremony, two very large white candles, the height of a person and about five inches in diameter, decorated with a fresh flower bouquet, were lit and held by a bridesmaid and the groom's best man. The first candle to flicker out represented the death of that person.

Upon eyeing someone with a particular condition or witnessing a scary situation, the viewer would spit sideways three times and cross themselves three times to avoid a similar fate. This included seeing a black cat in the vicinity. Knocking on wood three times as in the Holy Trinity was a way to ward off evil spirits who might lurk nearby, or avoid the possibility of similar injury, i.e., knock on wood, I hope I never get divorced.

Children were not supposed to talk or sing at the dinner table or else risk marrying a gypsy. Since nobody wanted to live in a tent and travel in a covered wagon, kids were pretty quiet at suppertime. I may have told mom at least a couple of times that I did not care since gypsies made good roasted sunflowers and I wanted to be a sunflower vendor when I grew up.

Whenever I had a headache, mom was convinced that I was a victim of the evil eye. She would make me sit still, moved around me three times while she mumbled incantations, and then my headache was supposed to disappear. Too bad the nerve endings on my scalp were not getting the memo. This pseudo-method was never demonstrated that it worked, but mom and many others like her tried it anyway.

Pets

I suppose I had lots of pets as I was growing up, geese, dogs, cats, rabbits, chicken, cows, pigs, horses. None of them fell in the category of house pets. They hanged around the yard and some in the house but were never allowed to spend the night inside grandma Elena's house. The closest pets or pests, depending on your viewpoint, who slept and lived with us were fleas that colonized her beds, our clothes, and her rugs. We were constantly flea bitten, my skin looked like the canvas of a flea artist. The sheets and the night gowns were covered in blood from the numerous bites suffered during the night. Occasionally, mamaia, as I called grandma Elena, would get serious about flea control and spray DDT. They died for a while until the eight cats or so hanging around the house would track them in again, carrying a myriad of newborn babies. DDT was strong but was eventually banned in the U.S. and production ceased. That did not stop Romanians from using it - they had stockpiled it for decades.

There were no vets to take pets to, give them shots, special food, special diet, treatment for wounds, etc. Cats and dogs had to be resilient, learn to live with injuries, lick them and make them better, or kick the bucket. Surprisingly, in spite of utter neglect, cats and dogs lived longer lives than most pampered pets in the U.S. We had large animal vets to treat cows, horses, donkeys, goats, pigs, and sheep. Even they were not exactly living it up at Club Med. I remember at least 4 pigs who had to be put to sleep because of trichinosis. The vet tech was called on special occasions, when large animals were sick, had stopped eating, or had a difficult birth, such as a cow with a breech birth, and breaking the calf's ankle bone. The bone never healed and the vet had to put it to sleep. I cried because I bottle fed the calf and named him. It was a bitter pill to swallow, losing my charge.

Pets had to fend for themselves in the bitter colds of winter. Dogs had a dog house with an old raggedy blanket on the dirt floor and nothing else. Cats lived a little better, they could sleep in the attic where it was quite cosy in the midst of dry, warm hay and lots of rats and mice. Chicken, ducks, cows, pigs, goats, sheep, and horses were huddled in the barn where temperatures were a little milder. Mamaia would bring in the house the newborn calf, goat, sheep for a few days then return it to its mother. My Bogart lives like a king by comparison. Nobody would fuss over kitty litter, a warm house, a warm cat bed, wool rugs, yearly trips to the vet for shots, or medical treatment for the many scrapes he gets from the altercation with animals crossing his territorial domain. He certainly does not have to suffer from flea infestations and neither do we.

Surviving on table scraps, most cats and dogs were mangy looking, yet somehow they survived accidents or animals diseases. I supposed the lack of vehicles on the road spared many animals an early death. Feeding pets store bought, specially made for animals packaged food was non-existent. And if it did, people could not afford it.

Farmers were very utilitarian when it came to killing animals for their fur - they used it to make warm clothing and hats but also ate the animal. No PETA would shame them into giving up slaughtering an animal in exchange for survival and warmth. The one shameful story makes my skin cringe. The village had a pit in a hallow where all unwanted pups and kittens were dumped as soon as they were born. The hole was so deep, nobody crawled out and no food or water was delivered. I can still hear the howls and faint meows of despair, hunger, and pain. I was just a kid when I realized what they were doing. I cried for days begging grandpa to deliver food and to put a stop to it. I was hoping his could convince the village elders to find a more humane way to deal with unwanted pets. Spaying and neutering were impossible and too expensive. People were poor and primitive in their mentality. I would go and throw food into the hole but they died of thirst first. Runaways were lucky - their babies were safe from the hell hole.

Romania was eventually admitted to the European Union. Prior to the adherence, many written and unwritten laws had to be changed. Cruelty to animals was redressed in cities by allowing feral dogs and cats to multiply to the point where herds roamed the streets out of control. Dogs became more than a nuisance, attacking small children on a regular basis, maiming many, killing some, and even injuring adults. One such vicious attack killed a Japanese businessmen in downtown Bucharest, while he was attempting to enter his high rise apartment building. His femoral vein was torn by the vicious bite and he bled to death. It was not unusual to see a feral cat or dog enter a department store or grocery store looking for food and people shrugged their shoulders. PETA made its way into Romania, and no more dogs were put to sleep or mistreated. Consequently, they multiplied wildly, as no veterinarian euthanasia was allowed. Country folks continued their cruel traditions unchecked.

Rats and mice had a plentiful life on the farm. They had corn and wheat in the attic and lots of food in the cellar. They burrowed between the walls and made their way to the attic. On any given night, there was a concert of tapping feet, going back and forth inside the walls, between the attic and the cellar. Eventually the colony grew so large, the house had to be destroyed and grandpa rebuilt nearby with brick and mortar, a much nicer home.

Religion

Most people do not understand what orthodox is - they think Jewish. I am not sure most orthodox people truly understand the mystical side of their religion. I can feel it when I enter a majestic cathedral in Europe, richly decorated with lavish columns, statues, icons, and symbols lost in translation and in our understanding. I was torn many times, upon standing inside St. Peter's Basilica, between my feelings of awe at the magnificent and opulent construction and my feelings of sorrow at the sacrifice so many millions of poor people had to make in order that such a jewel of architecture and art could be enjoyed by generations after generations. Did they starve in order to pay heavy taxes, what horrid living conditions had they endured, were they forced to work long hours for meager pay in order that this basilica be built?

Orthodox religion predates Catholicism by a year or two. If you ask a catholic, they will tell you Catholicism is the oldest organized form of religion in existence. Some historians and orthodox themselves believe The Orthodox Church to be the One, established 2,000 years ago by Jesus Christ and his Apostles. Daddy used to tell me that our family originated with the Apostles since our last name is Apostolescu, Romanian for "of the Apostles." Christianity struggled to exist during Roman times when they were forced to worship in tunnels underground Rome. Domitila's catacombs contain one of the first underground Christian churches.

The Orthodox Church is officially called the Orthodox Catholic Church and commonly referred to as the Eastern Orthodox Church. The Church is composed of several self-governing ecclesial bodies, each geographically and nationally distinct but theologically unified. Each self-governing body, often but not always encompassing a nation, is shepherded by a synod of bishops whose duty, among other things, is to preserve and teach the Apostolic traditions and church practices. As in the Roman Catholic Church, Anglican Church, Oriental Orthodoxy and some other churches, Orthodox bishops trace their lineage back to the Apostles through the process of Apostolic Succession.

The Orthodox Church claims to trace its development back through the Byzantine or Roman empire, to the earliest church established by St. Paul and the Apostles. After baptism, a person is blessed with the Holy Spirit and must embark on a spiritual pilgrimage of striving to be more holy and "Christ Like." Most babies are baptized shortly after birth and there is a God-mother holding the newborn at the altar while the ceremony is performed. She is a stand-in mom in case something happens to the real mom. The God-mother is revered, loved, respected, and celebrated through her entire life. My own God-mother, aunt Stela, passed away a month ago. Although I miss her and have not seen her since 1985, I feel blessed that I was able to speak to her weekly until her last five days of life when she was in and out of consciousness.

The Biblical text used by the Orthodox includes the Greek Septuagint and the New Testament. It includes the seven Deuterocanonical Books which are generally rejected by Protestants and a small number of other books that are in neither Western canon. These books are used in the Divine Liturgy. Icons adorn the walls of Eastern Orthodox churches and cover the inside structure completely. Countryside Orthodox homes have an area set aside for family prayer, usually an eastern facing wall, on which are hung many icons. City homes do not have such "altars."

The calculation of Orthodox Easter is very complex, the Sunday following Paschal full moon (PFM), pronounced, "Pas-kul." Easter Sunday is the date of the annual celebration of Christ's resurrection. The Easter Dating Method has to maintain the same season of the year and the same relationship to the preceding astronomical full moon that occurred at the time of his resurrection in 30 A.D. Easter dates vary and very seldom coincide with the Protestant Easter. There was a joke about a priest who kept kernels of corn in his jacket to be able to tell parishioners how many days were left until Easter. He would quickly count how many kernels he had left in his jacket pocket after he had carefully thrown one kernel out each day. His housekeeper had thought, upon discovering his stash of corn, that the Father liked corn, so she added a handful into his pocket. When he met with a parishioner and was asked how many days until Easter, he proceeded to count the corn. Exasperated, after he counted and counted, with no end in sight, he told the parishioner that there wasn't going to be Easter that year after all.

Certainly there was no Orthodox Sunday School to attend and nobody taught us lessons from the Bible. Older females in the family would tell stories each evening after supper, while we sat around on benches outside in the garden or by the side of the road. All homes were surrounded by tall wood fences and had a very large bench in front of the main gate, outside the fence. This bench was the gathering place for many villagers who happened to walk by on their way home. I heard many fascinating stories this way, sitting at my grandparents' feet.

Aunt Leana, who was a deacon at Popesti Orthodox Church, had a well-worn Bible from which she would read stories every time I visited. She had an oil lamp by her side, large magnifying glasses tied with a string, and a large bowl of fresh fruit and grapes from her orchard. We sat on the porch or in her tiny and cozy two-room mud brick house. When her eyes got tired, she would start singing Gregorian chants and nasalized humming which she often did, accompanying the readings during Liturgy.

We had no Bible lessons - 40 years or more of communist rule forbade the owning of a Bible, open prayer,Bible study in school, and church attendance. Believers were ridiculed as missing their marbles. Atheism was the state religion. The only people who were really semi-free to observe their religion were the elderly. The communists decided that they already had a foot in the grave and one on the proverbial banana peel, who cared if they went to church? Consequently, most of the regulars were little old ladies. That's because men died much sooner than women - men pretty much counted on being survived by their wives. These ladies helped the priest with daily chores, cleaned the church, polished the silver icons, mended the kneeling pillows, cleaned the candle wax off the floors and candle holders, tended the surrounding gardens, planted the flowers, the shrubs, and cut the grass around cemetery plots with a scythe.

Easter and Christmas were the only holidays when church attendance grew tenfold. The commie handlers allowed the masses to celebrate, but took notes cautiously and carefully. We carried lit candles at midnight around the church, sang Gregorian chants, prayed and celebrated our humanity from God. Food was brought to church and shared with everybody in remembrance of Christ and beloved family members who passed away.

There were Catholics in Transylvania in western Romania, among Swabians and Hungarians, a few Baptists here and there, Lutherans in western Transylvania, and Muslims in eastern Romania, at the Black Sea, close to the European side of Istanbul. I remember visiting a mosque with my aunt at the Black Sea - it was more like a museum visit, the mosque was empty. Neither faith enjoyed much freedom, they were on par with the Orthodox. The only concession made was the use of their own language, i.e., German, Hungarian, and Arabic.

The American Bible Society had donated Bibles to the state after a terrible earthquake - they wanted the victims to find comfort in the word of God. The state, however, decided to recycle them into toilette paper. The quality of print and material was so good and the quality of manufacture so poor that the words of the Bible were still legible on the rolls of toilette paper. I had just started studying English and I pointed that out to my dad. We were appalled and saddened by the offensive abuse of the Holy Book.

Baptisms, funerals, and weddings were certainly not frowned upon. Communist elites tried to replace weddings with civil ceremonies, but most people preferred to have both. The church ceremony was always viewed as more meaningful. Everybody had to be baptized and given a name, even commies accepted that. And, of course, funerals, nobody escaped death, and, since there were no funeral homes, churches were the logical place for the last rites and passage to the other world. The last ride to the cemetery was done with pomp and circumstance, a funeral band, and a horse-drawn carriage or a large truck bed, depending on the status of the deceased.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Food

We never had enough food to satisfy everyone. Often we went to bed hungry. We were skinny and malnourished. Even vitamins were unavailable - the communists rationed everything in order to make ends meet. They were selling everything of value that the country produced as fast as they could say, "sold." Even old oil reserves were gone - new ones were hard to explore as oil layered through hard rock at depths impossible to drill. Most food in high demand was exported to Germany and other western nations in exchange for technology and hard currency, usually the U.S. dollar. We were left with bones and empty shelves. I suppose bones were good for soup, our basic lunch and dinner staple. Bread was relatively cheap and we ate lots of it. Ceausescu, the insane communist president, wanted to industrialize the country as fast as possible, at the expense of the standard of living of most Romanians - the elite in charge was spared, they lived like kings. So what if we had to eat bones and wilted vegetables? It was for a good cause, the Utopian socialism. Never mind that everybody who tried this scientific socialism had failed miserably, we had to keep on trying, repeat the same mistakes until we got a different result - a formula for sheer lunacy.

I will never forget my shock when I entered an American grocery store for the first time - Horn's Big Star. I was amazed at the vast choices and availability of fruits and vegetables out of season and fresh. I did not have to fight other shoppers for the last bottle of milk, pat of butter, or loaf of bread. I did not have to get up at 4 a.m. to stand in line for a 7 a.m. opening of the store. I did not have to carry rationing coupons with me. Groceries were bagged and carried to my car with a smile. The owner was friendly all the time and offered to order items that were not stocked daily. Nobody fought over food, there were no empty shelves, ever, and people did not have to go hungry. Yet I could not fathom why people bemoaned their poverty and hunger, while visibly showing signs of obesity. It was a compliment to tell someone they looked good, they were fat. Fat meant that they had plenty to eat, no starvation. Fat people were considered well off. The "evil" corporations took advantage of Americans, oh, my. I believed them to be spoiled, bratty adults, tired of overabundance and self-indulgence, having everything handed to them, while making more and more impossible and outlandish demands.

I don't look at food the same way Americans do. I know the toil behind a cluster of ripe grapes, the sweat behind a fragrant apple, and the backache behind a perfect strawberry just picked off the vine. Food is not a pleasure to be cherished socially in a fine restaurant, or with friends and family, it is instead sustenance and survival. Americans tend to overeat because food is so bountiful and cheap. We spend only 15% of income on food. Romanians and other poor nations spend a much larger portion of their incomes for daily staples of simple food. I never look at an orange or banana the same way my husband does. He sees a fruit that is either overripe or too green, something mundane that can be bought in the grocery store on any given day. I see perfection, a real treat, something eaten on special occasions. The scent of an orange brings memories of Christmas, the Christmas tree candles casting shadows on a solitaire orange hanging from its boughs with a red ribbon, and the smell of fresh spruce.

My favorite snack was roasted sunflower seeds, they were cheap and plentiful. The only problem was that the purveyors of such fine foods were the gypsies. Mom was horrified because they roasted their seeds in the same aluminum tubs that they washed clothes in and tripled as chamberpots. She invented the most outlandish stories to discourage me from running to the gypsies with every last nickle and dime I had to purchase sunflower seeds. They were cleverly wrapped in rolled newspapers. There was no such thing as packaging or plastic bags in stores, people had to improvise. Even the farmer's market in summer time used rolled newspapers in the shape of a cone as wrapping. Newspapers were magical, we used them for toilette paper, napkins, wrapping paper, bathroom reading material, to clean windows (the ink shined them better than Windex), blankets on grass, head cover from light rain, origami hat to shade from the sun, protective cover for books, and to shine shoes.

Food was cooked simply with sunflower or rape seed oil. Rape seed oil was more plentiful - there were fields of yellow flowers as far as the eye could see. The oil was heavier and thicker than sunflower oil. We either fried or boiled our food. Baking was rare, usually at Easter and Christmas. We ate lots of soup made from various green leaves in summer time, tomatoes, Feta cheese, cucumbers, green beans, cabbage, green peppers, lettuce, and green peas. We sliced them up and ate them raw with bread. We did not have salad dressing or mayo. Preparing mayo at home for potato salad was very time consuming and required a lot of elbow grease. We did not have mixers. Mom was a master at cooking a three course meal from one chicken. This happened once every ten days. We had chicken soup, chicken and rice, and fried chicken, all from one live chicken purchased at the farmer's market. Dad had the unpleasant task of having to cut the chicken's head off out in the yard. Mom had to dip it into boiling water to be able to pluck the feathers. To this day, I can smell the peculiar aroma of dipped feathers in hot water, it would make me gag every time. I used to hide because I did not want to see the poor chicken hopping around in the yard headless. I knew we had to eat protein to survive but I disliked the way in which the chicken was slaughtered and could not stand the smell of plucking. Had we had peanut butter and soy beans, I would have made a conscious decision to avoid eating chicken. It was cruel to kill them this way. We ate more pork in winter time since they were slaughtered around Christmas. Beef was not part of our diet since it was usually very tough - they waited for the cow to be on her deathbed before they drove it to slaughter, it was too valuable alive for milk, butter, and cheese. We ate fried fish and sardines a lot, usually fried whole with bones in and heads, and, shock, whale meat. We bought blocks of whale meat imported from Japan. The process of killing such a magnificent and relatively rare animal had not occurred to me at the time. Grandpa's favorite food was tripe soup. Tripe was the lining of the cow's stomach and it looked and tasted rather rubbery. Lots of people considered brains a delicacy. I am proud to say that I never touched this unnecessary risk to one's health. My dad liked fried livers - I found them disgusting, along with all the organs associated with the chicken or the cow.

During Lent, mom and I would make eight-shaped sweet dumplings with walnut pieces. It was an orthodox tradition. I asked her why in the shape of an eight, but she did not know, it was tradition. During funerals, the older women would make a wheat/barley seed sweet concoction that would be given to the poor in memory of the deceased. Since we were all poor, everybody ate "coliva."

Grandma Elena's cure for everything was chicken soup and fried liver. The thought of fried liver turns my stomach even today. My comfort food was boiled potatoes and french fries. As a toddler, I learned that grandma boiled potatoes for the pig and I raided his trough frequently to my grandma's desperation.

Sweets and sugary foods were rare, consequently few people were obese or suffered from diabetes. Summer time was fruit and watermelon heaven. If we could not buy it at the farmer's market, we went to Mamaia's house - there was always an endless supply of fruits in season that could be picked. And, if she did not have it, there were the neighbor's. Taking food was not considered stealing as the villagers, with their meager resources, were very generous. I climbed prune trees, peach trees, apple and pear trees, and anything else that was edible. Grandpa Ilie's venerable old walnut tree was off limits - it had been planted by his grandfather. There was a tree not far from the outhouse that produced a yellow berry, the size of a raspberry. We climbed that tall tree many times for juicy berries, with total disregard for the proximity to the outhouse. Why would we care? We were kids and ate anything that tasted good and we never washed them.

We only got in trouble when picking radiant red poppies in a wheat field that belonged to the communist co-operative and the watchman chased us with an ax. I still remember the sheer terror of impending death by decapitation with an ax when I see red poppies. He was so angry, perhaps the poppies were his opium stash and we stumbled upon it accidentally. I can still smell the pungent odor of the stems.

My American born children were very wasteful with their food. When they were very young, we took regular trips to Pizza Hut. Half of the pizza was usually squandered after they were full. I scolded them that some Chinese children were starving and they should learn to order only what they could consume. With a cocky attitude, my girls offered to mail them to China or challenged me to name a few Chinese starving at that moment. The wastefulness was lost on them.

We never knew what eating out meant. Fancy restaurants were off-limits for the unwashed masses and fast food restaurants did not exist. Nobody fed us breakfast and lunches at school. The government could not care less if we went hungry, had money to buy food, or had time and energy to stand in lines in sub-zero temperatures for hours. We ate better and stuffed ourselves at weddings, baptisms, and funerals. Easter and Christmas were also occasions of good eating and over stuffing. Going on a picnic was reserved for party elites who revelled in their new-found power to grab the best accommodations for themselves and their families.

I can only remember a couple of occasions when I ate out - at lake Snagov with Manescu and his wife - he had money and power none of us could even dream of. Both were very influential in the communist party. The second time I dined in decadent luxury was at my wedding, in the restaurant rented by my father.

There was no such thing as spending the night at the house of a friend or pajama parties. First of all, pajamas were hard to find. Secondly, parties were considered bourgeois, unless you were part of the ruling elite. Nobody in his/her right mind would be willing to feed half a dozen kids at an overnight party when food was hard to procure and families could barely afford to feed themselves.

Nobody kidnapped kids because they were too expensive to feed. You could let them walk to school alone, take the bus, and they always came back. Besides, with all the levels of police tripping over themselves everywhere, nobody dared to do anything illegal or stupid that would land them in jail, doing hard time in a real gulag, not some Club Med on steroids.

Nobody had birthday parties or birthday cakes. It was a luxury reserved for those in power. Occasionally, my dad would take us for our Sunday promenade and feed us cake at the bakery on the boulevard. I always felt special, daddy's little girl, because dad sacrificed his allowance to buy me a decadent piece of velvety chocolate cake. It was the ultimate luxury for me. There was ice cream in the bakery as well, but it was a rare treat. The ultimate luxury was Profiterole, an ice cream and cake concoction that only the French could make so divine.

Few people owned a refrigerator and if they did, it was very small. It was thus necessary to buy food every day. Mom, dad, and I took turns shopping, but it was mostly mom's duty and mine. We purchased vegetables in summer time at the farmer's market and had to be quite choosy as our food budget was limited. The state had green groceries but the shelves were mostly empty. Some had a few wilted leaves of spinach or potatoes with worms poking out of holes. The Colorado beetle loved potatoes! I did not know where Colorado was, but I was positive it was infested with bugs since this fast-multiplying pest had hitched a ride so many thousands of miles away, arriving in Romania on a plane and devouring our precious food.

In winter time it was more difficult to find vegetables. There were some canned fruits and vegetables, quite expensive and often inedible as cans and jars were poorly sealed. Meat was plentiful as it was easier to preserve by curing with salt or curing with lard. My grandparents had a basement that had a constant low temperature and they stored some fruits and cured meat and salty, smoked fish.

Why did we shop every day for food? Was it because we liked fresh more? Was it because we had no refrigeration? Was it because we had no cars and could only carry a day's supply of food with two armloads?

My love for bread formed when I was six years old and mom sent me to the store with three lei wadded in my sweaty palm to buy French bread. I loved French bread, and, if I was lucky, it would still be warm from the oven. I would eat half the crust by the time I made it home. It was worth the spanking I got every time for ruining the loaf for everybody else. Wheat bread was round and less expensive - we had no idea that the fiber was stripped from the white bread. We thought the communists were lucky because they could buy French bread any time they wanted while we had to eat darker bread which was harder to chew.

Grandpa spoiled me twice a year with a chocolate bar filled with raisins. Raisins - it was heaven. They were hard to come by - grapes were turned into wine, it was much more profitable than raisins. Besides, all the winos paid heavy taxes for their drinking curse.

Every family owned a couple of seltzer bottles made of heavy gauge green or blue glass. A refill center would pressurize gas and water into this bottle for a small fee. In Roman style, wine and seltzer were mixed half and half to make the wine last longer. Although a wire mesh was cupping the seltzer bottle while being filled with water and CO2, accidents happened and people would be decapitated or maimed. I thought it a heavy price to pay for some one's addiction to drinking. Children would mix seltzer water with syrup and have an instant soda. There was no such thing as Coke or Pepsi. They were introduced on the market in Romania in the early 1980s but only the privileged few had access to buy it.